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+--- Thread: r/HonestHotTakes: “most men wouldnt want to be parents if they had to be mothers” (/showthread.php?tid=2021)
r/HonestHotTakes: “most men wouldnt want to be parents if they had to be mothers” - Clover - Sep 13 2026
https://www.reddit.com/r/HonestHotTakes/comments/1wfal20/most_men_wouldnt_want_to_be_parents_if_they_had/
most men wouldnt want to be parents if they had to be mothers the expectations of fatherhood are by default much less than of motherhood. becoming a father,your expectations are essentially "be semi-present and dont abandon your child"
as a mother, your entire identity and existence becomes wrapped in your child. you have to put down your hobbies and life to take care of a thing thats attached to you basically 24/7, along with household managing.
And then as the child gets older, theres all the management that comes with it. Sports, doctors office, school. All things that father's are expected to be minimally involved in, but mothers are expected to have total control of.
ETA: i thinm its really funny how men are immediatly jumping to say how much they would LOVE to be a stay at home parent! which im sure you would!
Except most women aren't stay at home parents, they work to support their family as much as the father does, and economically being a stay at home parent isnt conceivable.
Comments:
Quote:Why does every father here think being a mom automatically means staying at home ? Most women work these days
Quote:Yeah, I don't get it. Almost every mom i know including myself is holding down a fulltime federal job and has multiple kids.
Quote:Exactly. And they still do all the things OP pointed out while many fathers - in my experience not as many as a few decades ago - are semi-present.
Quote:I don’t know any semi present fathers really. Not saying they don’t exist but where do yous live that you all seem to think this is a common occurrence?
Quote:I live in a very liberal area. I dont know a single man who planned their kids birthday party or plan the playdates.
Quote:Weird how the comments all jump immediately to “i’d love to stay at home all day!”Nobody jumping in saying “i’d love to carry for 9 months, give birth, work 40+/weeks and do all the child rearing and household management too!” 😆
Quote:More proof that they have absolutely no concept of all of the invisible labor, hardship on the body and mind, and full depth of what parenting entails.