Detrans into tradwife?

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Detrans into tradwife?

Detrans into tradwife?

YesYourNigel

206

Jun 8 2025, 3:47 PM

#1

I've seen a few trans activists point out that a lot of detrans women essentially end up being groomed into detransitioning by men who then turn them into their own tradwives. Given how often I've seen detrans women rush full steam towards hyperfeminine gender roles to the point that I almost never see butch and gender nonconforming women, and given the fact that these trans activists were also right about the spread of conservativism (which I didn't initially believe and thought was just another one of their brainless poo-poo tactics), I'm curious about how prevalent this is. I find it absolutely tragic that even detrans women can't stop chasing patriarchal approval through self-harming gender roles, so I would find it very unsurprising that this is happening, and also depressing that so many anti-trans activists are more concerned with using these women as "gotchas" than actually looking at whether their reasons for detransitioning were just as unhealthy as trans people's reasons for transitioning.

I refuse to debate two obvious facts: 1. the patriarchy exists 2. and that's a bad thing

YesYourNigel

Jun 8 2025, 3:47 PM #1

I've seen a few trans activists point out that a lot of detrans women essentially end up being groomed into detransitioning by men who then turn them into their own tradwives. Given how often I've seen detrans women rush full steam towards hyperfeminine gender roles to the point that I almost never see butch and gender nonconforming women, and given the fact that these trans activists were also right about the spread of conservativism (which I didn't initially believe and thought was just another one of their brainless poo-poo tactics), I'm curious about how prevalent this is. I find it absolutely tragic that even detrans women can't stop chasing patriarchal approval through self-harming gender roles, so I would find it very unsurprising that this is happening, and also depressing that so many anti-trans activists are more concerned with using these women as "gotchas" than actually looking at whether their reasons for detransitioning were just as unhealthy as trans people's reasons for transitioning.

I refuse to debate two obvious facts: 1. the patriarchy exists 2. and that's a bad thing

Elsacat

364

Jun 8 2025, 9:04 PM

#2

I haven't noticed this pipeline, but maybe it's because I've backed away from focusing so much on trans and GC stuff. I don't doubt that it's happening, because it's just another way for women to flee - either away from womanhood (trans) or crazily deep into stereotypical womanhood (tradwife). Anti-trans activists are not necessarily pro-woman and won't bother to examine why these women are taking this route. They'll just consider it a win that a woman wants to be "feminine" again. They won't care that she's into another cult, as long as she's out of the cult they dislike most.

Elsacat

Jun 8 2025, 9:04 PM #2

I haven't noticed this pipeline, but maybe it's because I've backed away from focusing so much on trans and GC stuff. I don't doubt that it's happening, because it's just another way for women to flee - either away from womanhood (trans) or crazily deep into stereotypical womanhood (tradwife). Anti-trans activists are not necessarily pro-woman and won't bother to examine why these women are taking this route. They'll just consider it a win that a woman wants to be "feminine" again. They won't care that she's into another cult, as long as she's out of the cult they dislike most.

skunk

45

Jun 9 2025, 7:42 AM

#3

While I haven't seen the detrans to tradwife thing happen myself, im not too surprised that it could be happening. I noticed a lot of detrans or desisted women wind up going the total opposite direction and start trying to be huperfeminine and still generally hypwrfocusing on gender stereotypes and roles. A lot of them try to start "embracing being a woman" or "feeling like a woman" by going right back to sex stereotypes. The number of detrans women I've seen that have gone from "im genuinely a man because I've never felt girly" to feeling like they need to master make up and wear dreases is staggering. On one hand, I guess its good they're not medicalizing themselves anymore but its depressing to see that, most of the time, they haven't actually broken out of this patriarchal, stereotypical thinking. Which is what actually needs to happen.

No idea what to do about all that, though. I understand where they're coming from and how they might feel, especially if they've already taken hormones long enough to get physical changes.

skunk

Jun 9 2025, 7:42 AM #3

While I haven't seen the detrans to tradwife thing happen myself, im not too surprised that it could be happening. I noticed a lot of detrans or desisted women wind up going the total opposite direction and start trying to be huperfeminine and still generally hypwrfocusing on gender stereotypes and roles. A lot of them try to start "embracing being a woman" or "feeling like a woman" by going right back to sex stereotypes. The number of detrans women I've seen that have gone from "im genuinely a man because I've never felt girly" to feeling like they need to master make up and wear dreases is staggering. On one hand, I guess its good they're not medicalizing themselves anymore but its depressing to see that, most of the time, they haven't actually broken out of this patriarchal, stereotypical thinking. Which is what actually needs to happen.

No idea what to do about all that, though. I understand where they're coming from and how they might feel, especially if they've already taken hormones long enough to get physical changes.

YesYourNigel

206

Jun 15 2025, 6:07 PM

#4

Quote:On one hand, I guess its good they're not medicalizing themselves anymore but its depressing to see that, most of the time, they haven't actually broken out of this patriarchal, stereotypical thinking. Which is what actually needs to happen.

Instead of injecting themselves with testosterone they'll start injecting themselves with botox and silicone. We need to stop acting as if femininity is preferable to EWWW TRANS, as if femininity doesn't lead to mental illness and self-harm (not to mention grooming women into abusive relationships) in pandemic numbers. But femininity is "normal" so it's seen as preferable and natural, even though it's SNAFU.

Quote:I understand where they're coming from and how they might feel, especially if they've already taken hormones long enough to get physical changes.

I don't. I try my damnest to be mistaken for a man in day to day life because actually being treated as a human being feels good. I think once you get a taste of the treatment that men get, and if you don't internalise the shame and self-hatred that tells you you're undeserving of it, you can't go back. I don't get why it's a problem to not be perceived as a woman enough, doubly so for people who went out of their way to take hormones in order to attain certain changes. You're a woman with characteristics typical of a testosterone overdose. You're still a woman. I don't want these people to get testosterone and plastic surgeries because of how much if fucks their bodies up, but if it didn't, then I genuinely wouldn't see an issue with women using it.

YesYourNigel

Jun 15 2025, 6:07 PM #4

Quote:On one hand, I guess its good they're not medicalizing themselves anymore but its depressing to see that, most of the time, they haven't actually broken out of this patriarchal, stereotypical thinking. Which is what actually needs to happen.

Instead of injecting themselves with testosterone they'll start injecting themselves with botox and silicone. We need to stop acting as if femininity is preferable to EWWW TRANS, as if femininity doesn't lead to mental illness and self-harm (not to mention grooming women into abusive relationships) in pandemic numbers. But femininity is "normal" so it's seen as preferable and natural, even though it's SNAFU.

Quote:I understand where they're coming from and how they might feel, especially if they've already taken hormones long enough to get physical changes.

I don't. I try my damnest to be mistaken for a man in day to day life because actually being treated as a human being feels good. I think once you get a taste of the treatment that men get, and if you don't internalise the shame and self-hatred that tells you you're undeserving of it, you can't go back. I don't get why it's a problem to not be perceived as a woman enough, doubly so for people who went out of their way to take hormones in order to attain certain changes. You're a woman with characteristics typical of a testosterone overdose. You're still a woman. I don't want these people to get testosterone and plastic surgeries because of how much if fucks their bodies up, but if it didn't, then I genuinely wouldn't see an issue with women using it.

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