Social Media “aitah for refusing to change bikinis after my husband had asked me to wear a thong?”
Social Media “aitah for refusing to change bikinis after my husband had asked me to wear a thong?”
[deleted OP] okay sooooo yesterday was my husband's birthday (we're both 22) and he wanted to have some friends over for some pool time. thought it was just gonna be a chill time, id cook for them, etc.
yesterday afternoon he asked if i could wear a thong bikini because he wanted to "show me off to his friends". now i have no problem wearing something that revealing when it's just the two of us, but i always opt for more coverage when we have company.
but i felt bad saying no to him on his birthday, so i told him that id do it. so i put it on about a half hour before his friends arrived and he was thrilled which made me feel a little bit better temporarily, but then he asked if i could take the bra pads out. i told him i really didn't wanna do that but he asked a few more times and i relented, but i was getting upset at this point.
his friends come over, im bringing them food and beers, and about an hour in my husband comes inside while im in the kitchen and says he doesn't like how much his friends are looking at me and that he wants me to change into a different bathing suit.
i told him that i wasn't gonna change. that he'd wanted me in next to nothing even when i didn't want to be, and that's what he was gonna get.
his friends left a few hours later and we got into a big fight, we're somewhat resolved now but i just feel weird.
i guess im just looking for unbiased opinions, aitah here? and any ideas what i should do going forward if something like this happens again?
Eponetha1339 Sounds like he got exactly what he deserved but you on the other hand messed up for yourself. Always take care of yourself first because if you don’t, you won’t be able to take care of anyone else. If he wants you to do something that makes you morally uncomfortable and he doesn’t care about how it makes you feel, that’s not someone that cares about you. You owe it to yourself to say Hell NO and he can get over it regardless of what day it is.
[deleted OP] yeah i love that! i just hate the idea of disappointing him but then it gets me into situations like this one
Lady_Purrsia You don’t want to disappoint a man who has zero issues disrespecting your boundaries and parading you as an object and disappointing you bc he’s barreling over your boundaries?!?
You’re worried about disappointing a man like that?
You’re not worried about disappointing yourself by allowing a man to blatantly disrespect you like this? Husband or not - he seems to think you’re his property to command at will.
Make it make sense!!
If he wanted 100% unquestioned obedience he needs to get a damned dog. You’re no dog OP!
[deleted OP] well when you put it like that...
r/AITAH post: https://www.reddit.com/r/AITAH/comments/1esvs1n/aitah_for_refusing_to_change_bikinis_after_my/
[deleted OP] okay sooooo yesterday was my husband's birthday (we're both 22) and he wanted to have some friends over for some pool time. thought it was just gonna be a chill time, id cook for them, etc.
yesterday afternoon he asked if i could wear a thong bikini because he wanted to "show me off to his friends". now i have no problem wearing something that revealing when it's just the two of us, but i always opt for more coverage when we have company.
but i felt bad saying no to him on his birthday, so i told him that id do it. so i put it on about a half hour before his friends arrived and he was thrilled which made me feel a little bit better temporarily, but then he asked if i could take the bra pads out. i told him i really didn't wanna do that but he asked a few more times and i relented, but i was getting upset at this point.
his friends come over, im bringing them food and beers, and about an hour in my husband comes inside while im in the kitchen and says he doesn't like how much his friends are looking at me and that he wants me to change into a different bathing suit.
i told him that i wasn't gonna change. that he'd wanted me in next to nothing even when i didn't want to be, and that's what he was gonna get.
his friends left a few hours later and we got into a big fight, we're somewhat resolved now but i just feel weird.
i guess im just looking for unbiased opinions, aitah here? and any ideas what i should do going forward if something like this happens again?
Eponetha1339 Sounds like he got exactly what he deserved but you on the other hand messed up for yourself. Always take care of yourself first because if you don’t, you won’t be able to take care of anyone else. If he wants you to do something that makes you morally uncomfortable and he doesn’t care about how it makes you feel, that’s not someone that cares about you. You owe it to yourself to say Hell NO and he can get over it regardless of what day it is.
[deleted OP] yeah i love that! i just hate the idea of disappointing him but then it gets me into situations like this one
Lady_Purrsia You don’t want to disappoint a man who has zero issues disrespecting your boundaries and parading you as an object and disappointing you bc he’s barreling over your boundaries?!?
You’re worried about disappointing a man like that?
You’re not worried about disappointing yourself by allowing a man to blatantly disrespect you like this? Husband or not - he seems to think you’re his property to command at will.
Make it make sense!!
If he wanted 100% unquestioned obedience he needs to get a damned dog. You’re no dog OP!
[deleted OP] well when you put it like that...
He wanted to parade his wife around in front of his friends as though she were a trophy, and then got upset when his buddies looked at his trophy.
I feel bad for her, I hope she runs ASAP.